Break open all the shackles....be free...be seamless...be one with the One...be Boundaryless..!!

You are me....I am You....We are the Universe...We are the trees, the insects, the animals.....We are Our Enemies...We are Our Hatred....We are the Love...Love thyself....You will love the Universe....Hate yourself....and you will discern that you are the most hated..!!

Saturday, December 11, 2010

I know not why...

I know not why...things do not seem to be as they were before....I know not why..I do not seem to be as I was as a child...Ever since I have been reading Paulo Coelho...Life has thrown open new dimensions to be explored...new meanings to be groped for..The writer has made such an indelible imprint on my heart...that I feel I am the protagonist...I feel what he feels...I experience the thoughts he describes...I feel I undergo all the trials and tribulations life bestows upon him..as the plot unfolds...The novels written by him do not seem to be just paper back issues printed and reprinted by the publisher to make quick bucks...The writer does not seem to have written the books just for the heck of it...They mirror my life to me...I confront the problems and wait for the due courses to unfold themselves, with baited breath and rapt attention...After, alas, the end marks its glorious beginning, I still linger in the streets where the protagonist has had accidents, has had conversations with business partners and friends, has had attended parties...I linger in the pizzerias of Paris and sand dunes of Kazakhstan..feeling to the bottom of my heart, every molecule of the cold breeze flowing across the lively desert....I feel the rhythm of the heart beats of the tribes and clans of the deserts - their mysticism and occultism...Their faith in the Divine Energy of the Lady...
All this, I try to reflect on the sultry busy-till-infinity Highway near my home...my room full of books and more books...the Internet, my blog...my ambitions and dreams as regards my future...my parents, sister, colleagues and classmates..the groupisms...the battle that happens between my classmates and I, with perfectly pleasing smiles on our faces as our sole weapons...the war we are constantly waging against each other...with a flawless showmanship of concern and solidarity towards each other....How different are the two worlds...!! Or are the two worlds really different..? Will these people..whom I loathe...and due to this sole reason why they listlessly occupy a lot of my mind, sitting beside the entrenched mirages of the dunes of Kazakhstan and confronting, there too, eye to eye, in discerning the Byzantine situation, have ever gone through what I am going through..? If yes, why are not they imbibing at least a bit of this blissful experience? If No, why not? Why doesn't God what them to understand Him? Now...let me not hurl the cynic's bin...(Amen).
Not to mention, at this juncture, how Nani cozily comes into picture with his astounding memory and jaw dropping intellect...constantly coaxing me to reach ever greater heights..and to keep forever defeating myself and for eternity to keep succeeding for myself....
Then I behold the grand entry of the untimely unwanted asides and excesses of the helpless rains...totally uncalled for...
All this conundrum seems to be pointless...nothing within...but, fortunately or unfortunately, nothing without too...The whole ring of concentric circles with the Kazakhstan desert, calm, composed and collected,resting at the center of the Circumpunct...beckons me to its bosom...forever to rest there at peace and tranquility... The mystical and spiritual world Paulo has created for me stays with me day in and day out...
The passionate writer he portrays in his magical works solicits the one in me and the meeting of the twain becomes irresistible... Now is 2.15.am...that dark deep hour in the night when all sane rest in their dreams...but the passionate Zahir in me...keeps me from sleeping...or for that matter stuffing myself with facts about Indian Economy, its development, Cost Accounting, and the like...But the same averse feeling does not exist towards Law...because, intuitively though I say this, it is governed by a Higher Law... and my Zahir is It's synonym...
(The magic Paulo creates in my world does not at all die...In fact, the inspiration of working late in the nights is drawn from him and him alone...)
The kind of spiritual feeling it gives...as if I am feeling the transcendental meeting of the "Tribe"going on...is impeccable....The whistle of the train does not die down the voices and signs of the Lady...The apotheosis of a bright new morn always lingers behind this state of trance...perhaps, this time, I know why...
This arduous process of reconciliation between the "dream world" and the "real world" is by no means a cake walk...I should stop being myself...in order that my Soul feels the change creeping into the very core of it...Even as I write this, it feels I am in an endless tryst with myself, and myself being the writer...world famous,  and Divinely Spiritual...I feel a clear and eager stream of happiness flowing into me...
I know not whence...I know not whereto...
What I know is just this - I know not why...
I know not why...

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